Masturbation Monday: Why Men Wanking Off Is Such an Embarrassment

men having sex with themselves

Choke the Chicken, Flog the Hog, Yank the Crank

or

Male Masturbation Gets the Shaft

I talk about fucking myself ALL the time. Most people do not do this. Most people keep their wanking off stories to themselves. I suppose this makes sense. Most people do not go around talking about how much they enjoy brushing their teeth, what the best toothbrushes are, how to really get in there with the bristles and get that gum disease off. So, I get why it might be a mundane subject to people. Because, yes, masturbation should be part of every person’s daily maintenance just like brushing one’s teeth.

So why is there so much stigma around dudes’ cuffing their carrots?

It probably has something to do with the phallocentrism that pops up all over our earth and of course, let us not forget the patriarchy.

We get it. You have a PENIS! Congrats.

The rest of the world doesn’t need to hear or see or smell anything to do with it. Keep it in your pants! Or take it out, buff the banana, and carry on your day.

You’re horny. You watch porn. You take pics of your dick and send it out to randos hoping one or two may bite–not literally– and send you some sexy pics back.

The stigma stems from TMD. Too much dick.

It’s a culture oversaturated — not by seeing dick necessarily — but by the unseen dicks’ need to shower the world with its creamy milk juice (over and over and over again).

Of course, this stigma makes talking about male masturbation as an art much harder.

For example, guys are not going around discussing tips for better baloney boppin.

Don’t even get me started on the toy industry! There are SOME good toys for the penis, but of course clits & g-spots by far rule this market.

Is talking about male masturbation in a mature way even possible? I don’t know. That’s the other thing about pounding the flounder, it’s almost always portrayed in mass media as something funny. Because the penis is funny let’s be honest. Sure, it’s sexy and hard and like a powerful rod of magic and delight, but still, male masturbation does not have the same sort of appeal as say ass fucking does or even watching a hot girl stick a wet carrot in her mouth.

I don’t know guys. You tell me. This is just round 1 on this topic as I feel like I have a lot to learn and I’m relying on YOU to inform me. So comment below or send me an email. Let me know your thoughts on the stigma surrounding teasing the weasel.

Also– buy this if you want a good male masturbator:

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Sometimes The Hardest Thing To Do Is Get Out of Bed

depression anger heat sadness

Yes, I’m Still Stuck In Bed, But I’m Working

or

Help! Send Food. And Beer.

Sure. I like talking about SEX. But that was never the entire intention of Go Eat a Carrot. The purpose was for me to let loose on all the truth I have bottled up in me. And what’s true today is that I’m tired of trying to conform to other people’s desires. Yes, there’s an entire world out there of sexploration to be had, but I’m not in the mood.

There I said it, the horniest woman on the planet is not in the mood.

We must have entered an alternate universe.

I’m hot. I’m overheated. I’m bordering the line of anger and depression. I could cave in and just embrace the gray but why do that when I can fight it off?

I haven’t been to the grocery store in weeks. The last thing I ate yesterday was BBQ leftover from my friend’s 4th of July party. You know, a party that happened more than a week ago. Somehow I’m still alive and mostly getting all of my calories from beer, which I also ran out of last night.

You know in Denver you can get all of the above delivered to you? Groceries, beer, even sex if you know how to use Tinder right.

But I refuse! I have two legs. I can walk to the store. Yet, I don’t. I open the fridge and go,

‘oh look, three rotting limes and one old carrot. Guess I’ll come back and look in here again in 15 minutes and hope things have changed.”

At least I still have hope even though nothing changes unless you actually do the things that make changes, hence why I’m still stuck here, hungry, thinking about making a lime/carrot juice.

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Wet & Wild Wednesday: This Boob’s For You

boobs instagram and body positivity

When You’re Angry and Depressed Just Get Naked

or

Your Body is Just a Body Moving Your Body Around

(Enjoy the video rant. An angry cry may occur in it)

I have, for many years, gone through phases where I fall into these dark holes. They’re dirtier and darker than anal holes let me tell you. Hippie-dippie people like to call it “the shadow self.” Whatever. It’s usually more menacing than a shadow, more like an empty cave that has a terrible heating and cooling system.

I care not about getting out of bed. I contemplate how I do not want to be here. And when I say here I mean Denver. I mean the United States. I mean Planet Earth. I mean here in this body.

I question my worth. I question every choice I’ve ever made. I question the people in my life and what might possibly be wrong with them to choose to spend time with me.

It starts as a simmer. Turns to a boil. Evaporates into nothingness.

The nothingness.

The care not.

The heavy gray blanket that suffocates and keeps me from moving forward.

I return to my body.

It’s funny because I imagine that many people think I’m putting up pics of my tits and ass on Instagram as some sort of desperate plea for attention. Of course, I enjoy attention but that’s not my motivation.

I do it because it’s what I have to give.

We’re all put into these vessels of flesh to learn and grow and connect. I happen to be blessed with a body that other people seem to enjoy looking at. What do I care if they look at it? Sure, I’m in charge with taking care of this thing and I could do a better job about that, but I believe we all should experience more pleasure. So here I am, mostly naked, giving strangers pleasure.

Perhaps deep down I’m just a giver with not much to give.

One day this body will be rotting in the ground and no one will want to look at it then so I might as well take some pics of it now so there’s digital proof of its existence.

I found a sentence in an old journal of mine that read,

“We’re all afraid of going after our dreams because if we fail, we will have nothing left.”

Well, I quit my job nearly a year ago to write a book. I wrote the first draft of that book.

And here I am left.
Nothing.

Yet, everything.

The opportunity to edit and write Draft 2.

The opportunity to keep showing off my boobs.

The opportunity to connect to you and you and you.

So sure, I like the attention, but it’s merely a side note to a much bigger picture. The concept that we get to move around in this package of bones and muscle and blood and skin and shit; that it’s all we really have right here where we are until we are not here anymore.

So fuck it. I embrace the dark. The light. The unknown. The complete and total hot mess that I am. And of course, I embrace the boobs.

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Tits Out Tuesday: The Problem With Casual Sex

the problem with casual sex

Fuck Who You Wanna Fuck

or

Be Who You Wanna Be

I follow a bunch of random pages on Instagram. It pretty much runs the spectrum from hedonism to cute puppies all the way to new-age spirituality bullshit and of course, alien conspiracies. The other day I saw several posts come up into my feed that all centered around the same concept– that casual sex is an energy suck.

Most of the posts read something like this:

“Everyone is too busy just having sex for pleasure with no connection. They’re going to lose their chance to find someone real because of their sexual desires (demons) …”

The concept stems from the idea that when you give a part of yourself to someone who has no intention of returning anything you give–you are transferring your energy into emptiness and soon you will also be empty inside.

I’m still trying to wrap my brain around this idea.

I think for the most part this idea is bullshit.

Is there an actual problem with casual sex?

Yes.

The problem is people who have a problem with it.

If you have a problem with it, then it’s not for you and that’s okay. But, if it’s not your thing that doesn’t mean it’s not for other people. And the only way you lose your energy is by choosing to give it to someone else.

Is it possible to continue creating connections with people AND also participate in casual sex? Perhaps it’s only for people who are capable of separating the meanings of experiences. Not every sexual encounter is about intimacy or spiritual bonding. Sometimes it’s just about enjoying pleasure for pleasure’s sake. If people are going around ONLY seeking pleasure ALL of the time, perhaps they’re all empty on the inside. Or maybe pleasure is just easier for them? Maybe they haven’t gotten to the point where they’re ready for a deeper, closer intimacy. Is that wrong?

It seems like it should come down to communication. If you’re looking for a connection that’s more than just pleasure, discuss it. Perhaps don’t fuck someone who’s only about the physical act of sex.

When you’re on the same page, it shouldn’t be an energy suck or cause for concern.

One form of sex is not necessarily more real than any other. Of course, when you’re into each other it can definitely make the sex better, but it also depends on your definition of better. So, what I’m getting at here is that I disagree with this new-agey bullshit that says casual sex is bad for the world. I believe that everyone should experience more pleasure and within that pleasure, we will all have better experiences here on earth. Perhaps I’m wrong. I’m okay with being wrong. But perhaps shedding the guilt around sexuality would be more beneficial to our planet than continuing to make people feel bad for the choices they’re going to make.

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Thirsty Thursday: It’s Okay to be Sexy on Social Media

drink up if you are thirsty

It’s Time to Get Quenched

or

When It’s Hot, We All Get Thirsty

Growing up, “Thirsty Thursday” used to mean 99 cent Route 44s from the Sonic aka America’s Favorite Drive-In. The best Thirsty Thursday Route 44 Sonic beverage choice is and will always be a Cherry Limeade. Other running-up choices include the Strawberry Lemonade or a Grape/Orange/Cherry Slush or maybe MAYBE if the mood is just right, a cherry/vanilla Dr. Pepper. Yum Sonic drinks. (Now I am actually getting thirsty).

Today to be “thirsty” means something entirely different.

It no longer has anything to do with getting a giant-ass styrofoam cup full of corn syrup/ sugar-laced soda mixed with those perfectly tiny squared ice cubes for super cheap (though perhaps Sonic still has that special IDK I haven’t been there on a Thursday in years.).

Now, “to be thirsty” means to want or need something… particularly in relation to either attention or sexual relations or sexual attention or social media likes etc. etc.

Here are some sentence examples of the two main ways the word “thirsty” is often used:

Dick messages like 50 women on Instagram every day asking them what’s up, trying to get them to talk and or fuck him; that bitch is thirsty.

Kitty has been staring at that guy across the bar for so long that drool is coming out her mouth and she’s about to start humping her chair; that bitch is thirsty.

Jack is always posting pics of his giant ass biceps on Instagram, that bitch is thirsty.

Krystal posts half-naked pics of herself all over Instagram all day, that bitch is thirsty.

Candy has sent over 5,000 emails trying to get interviews for publicity work, that bitch is thirsty.

SodaStream Fizzi MEGA KIT Sparkling Water Maker with 3 1L Carbonating Bottles and 60L CO2 Cylinder Cartridge,Lightweight Sleek Design, Makes Tap Into Sparkling Water in Seconds!

People seem to use this word in a negative context. Is it wrong to want attention? Is it wrong to want other people to see how sexy you are or to know that you’re thinking of them? Is it wrong to actually go after the things that you want? Fuck it. I don’t care. I’ll be thirsty all day every damn day.

As it was stated in an article called The Modern History of Thirst:

“I think holding in thirst to please other people and to be ‘cool’ is the thirstiest thing one can do.”

So I will not hold back my thirst.

I will continue to show my half naked body all over social media. Why? Because I like it. I like sex. I like being sexual. I like you liking it. I enjoy your attention.

I don’t give a fuck if you think I’m an attention-seeking slut because I AM. I am also about a million other things too so I can be that for a moment then go and be a weirdo who farts and picks her nose while she’s eating an entire container of ice cream. Why? Because we are all complex beings. We all have thirst, we all have hunger. We all want to be wanted whether we want to admit to that want or not.

So drink up bitches. This tall glass of lemonade won’t be full or wet for that many more days. . . (not sure if that sentence actually works in this context but I have other things to do with my day to day, like go and find a drink.)

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Am I More Liberal Than Actual Liberals?

goodbye liberalism

Goodbye, Liberalism. Hello, Open-mindedness.

or

What Does It Mean In The World of Politics Today?

According to pretty much every definition I could find on what it means to be “liberal,” it would seem that perhaps I AM liberal and people who say they’re liberal are NOT actually liberal. OR… we need to redefine what being a liberal actually means.

At its most basic, a liberal is supposed to be someone who is open-minded, someone who is willing to respect or accept behavior or opinions different from one’s own.

From where I see it there are a lot of people out there who claim to be a liberal, but then neither respect or accept behavior or opinions of other people who are not also “liberal.”

I know, I know, it’s HARD to accept that other people think women shouldn’t have abortions or have access to birth control or even basic health care.

I know, I know, it’s HARD to accept that other people like being able to buy a machine gun as easy (if not easier) as it is to buy some Sudafed from the grocery store.

I know, I know, it’s HARD to accept that other people HATE other people for no good reason except they don’t like the way they look or the things they do naked (or in leather and chains etc.) in the bedroom.

But even though those people are WRONG, we still have to ACCEPT that they exist and that they have a right to their own thoughts and opinions.

Stay with me here.

Conservatives think that abortion is MURDER. Buying a gun is a fundamental RIGHT. Homosexuality is a SIN.

If you believed something was murder or went against your religious (or other) belief systems wouldn’t you be a little ATTACHED to those ideas? Even if half of an entire culture disagrees.

A person’s belief system creates one’s value system and one’s value system is how people find connection, love, community, reasons to continue living etc.

So, if conservatives are right and liberals are right, wouldn’t that make EVERYONE wrong?

How can you even go about changing someone’s belief system, transforming someone’s values?

If you’re a vegan and you believe that meat is MURDER and you go around yelling at everyone to stop eating meat, how many people do you think are going to stop eating meat?

Not very many.

Because no one likes being yelled at.

How have vegans tricked so many people into cutting meat from their diet?

Scare tactics mostly.

But, most of the people who get scared into going vegan don’t stay vegan.

It’s only through rational conversation and leading by example does true change take place.

This goes for ALL beliefs, perspectives, etc.

It doesn’t feel good when someone tells you that you’re wrong when deep down you believe in the core of your being that you’re right. It makes you not want to associate with the person who makes you feel bad about what you believe.

And I know, I know, a lot of you are SCREAMING at me. You’re telling me that you wouldn’t WANT to hang out with a sexist racist homophobic conservative republican. FFIINNEE!!! Continue to NOT hang out with them. Whatever.

But we’re never going to get anywhere if we’re just sitting around yelling at each other on the internet.

Or if we all avoid confrontation with someone of different beliefs because it’s not a nice feeling to be wrong.

Not everything is nice. This shit isn’t nice. This shit is necessary. It’s necessary to have the conversations, to respect other people’s perspectives, to lead by example, to be right, to be wrong, to not feel guilty about the fact that you can’t get everyone in the world to believe everything you believe in… because maybe… just maybe… not everything you believe in is actually something you should believe in… and it’s not until you get with yourself and get with people outside of yourself, outside your group of not-as-open-minded-as-you-pretend-to-be-friends, that maybe we can repair some of the major damage we’re all doing to each other.

So, friends and frienemies, am I right? Am I wrong? Did this piss you off a little bit? Did it turn you on? Are you ready to have some ugly /not nice conversations? Not just with others but also with yourself? Tell me your thoughts. I’m OPEN to hear you.

Read my newest elephant journal article by going here: Why I’m No Longer Aligned with the Liberal Agenda 

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When People You Care About Almost Die

death and yolo

Please Do Not Die Yet My Friend(s)

or

YOLO, Death, and Shit.

Today I woke up to a text from my mother telling me that this guy who I have basically known since he was born (a few months after me) had had a heart attack. A 33-year-old man had his heart attack him. Are we already at that age where everyone around us is about to die? WTF?

Sometimes when I’m super depressed I think about death too much. Once I asked a guy at the bar how his 2017 went (as it was right after the new year) and he said, “good enough, I’m not dead.”

And I replied with, “But, how do you know that’s not better?”

He quickly and politely left that conversation.

But really. It’s a pretty deep and dark question. How do we know? We do not know. Even when we’re on mushrooms and we THINK we know, we think we get it, we still have no idea.

Isn’t that what makes living so beautiful and fun? Not really having any idea why we’re here or where we’re going next?

What a ride, huh?

I sent my friend a message asking him not to die today. He explained to me that he didn’t just have a heart attack, he had a MASSIVE heart attack.

To which I replied, “you always gotta go big huh?”

Like, what a jerk?!

People who die are dead and they no longer have to care about anything, but then there are the rest of us still here who have to deal with the death of that person.

I think a lot of people get super upset about other people dying mostly because it reminds them that they too will be dead soon.

And also of course, that the dead person will no longer be capable of contributing in anyway to the alive people’s lives–which is often sad if that dead person was entertaining or thoughtful or interesting in some way, shape, or form.

In any event, I am glad my friend is not dead. I am glad I am not dead (even though I feel dead inside quite often). I am glad there are so many alive people and that most of the people who are alive are pretty alright (some of you though need to work out a few things still).

Mostly glad that puppies and ice cream exist on this planet with me, but that’s a topic for another day.

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Weird Florida Stories About Good v. Evil

big dudes throwing things

Angel v. Demon

or

How to Balance Your Good and Your Evil

Friday Night Story

Saturday Night Story

There are moments in my life that I wonder if I am actually a bad influence on people. Like when I suggest to 20-years-olds that they can drink my beer when I’m “not looking” because I remember what it’s like to be a 20-year-old who wanted to drink. I think I’m doing a good thing when really I’m just helping a young woman potentially become an alcoholic.

Then the next night… my Tinder date takes me to the 4th bar of the night. As we park we see this HUGE dude throwing this newspaper stand all the way across the sidewalk. Eventually, we make our way to the front and he pops up.

Somehow I talk him out of murdering his girlfriend.

So. Am I an angel. Am I a demon? Is it possible to be both at the same time? Is that what makes us human? The same as being right AND wrong. And understanding it’s okay to be a walking contradiction because we ALL are.

This guy was like 6’5″ and SUPER buff but he was also a teddy bear at the same time who didn’t actually want to hurt the person he loved (and so he took it out on a newspaper stand). I found it fascinating. Like how he could throw other people’s property across the sidewalk and then the next minute be near tears thinking about how his mother never taught him how to love right.

Like, wow. That’s some fucking up-level self-reflection shit happening.

I am impressed by the nuances of humanity. Everyone talks about Florida in this sort of stereotypical way, where all the people here eat bath salts and try to eat each others’ faces off, but in reality, the people here are legit. There are hipsters and entrepreneurs and racists and artists and cooks that love wu-tang. It’s beautiful. Like I said to my friend the other night when I was SOBER and we were hanging out on the ocean… “we’re all just seashells that have been spat out of mother earth’s womb. Some of us are broken. Some of us are pretty. Some of us are broken AND pretty.”

Maybe we’ll be picked up and put into a pretty glass jar. Maybe we’ll get smashed into a million tiny pieces and become a part of the sand. Either way, we’re all here and we’re all trying to make it work, however, we can make it work for us while we’re here.

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Weed. What Is It Good For?

thoughts on marijuana

It’s 420. So Puff Puff. Pass?

or

Get High Or Get Off The Bowl.

Weed is not my favorite drug. In fact, out of all the drugs I’ve tried (which shall remain nameless as someone who does not feel like incriminating self), I’d say it’s maybe in 8th or ninth place. I’m def into substances that make me feel more alert and weed makes me feel like an idiot most of the time. Sure, maybe I am an idiot, but I don’t want to FEEL that way if I can help it.

I think all drugs should be legalized. I also think prostitution should be legalized. Not only that, but I think our education system should be upgraded to do something called ‘teach people how to critically think.’ If we did those things then perhaps we’d all be in better places in our lives.

I know it’s crazy to imagine a world without sheep. What kind of idiot would choose to take on all the shit work that no one else wants to do if EVERYONE was educated? (IDK maybe the junkies?)

Has anyone ever thought that if we gave people a chance that perhaps these people who weren’t ever given a chance might have the intelligence to invent something that could help all of us live better lives without needing dumb people to do dumb jobs?

Of course, then the government would be overthrown over and over again and people in power don’t like their power taken away.  So yes, let’s keep a large majority barely educated and oppressed so the rich can keep staying rich and the powerful can maintain their power.

Wow. That was some digression.

Anyway. Legalize drugs. Then they won’t be as fun to do. At least legalize mushrooms and ecstasy since they can actually help people live better lives after they’ve tripped their clits off. Not speaking from experience since I am not necessarily living a “better” life. Though quitting my open-space-standing-desk-job to write a book may sound glamorous to many of you who still work at stupid desk jobs, but I’m telling you right now it’s not a SMART move.

Brave-stupid, maybe.

But at least I don’t want to kill myself anymore.

LEGALIZE DRUGS!!!

Go Eat A Carrot!

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Addiction and Personal Growth, Bullshit?

addiction

Maybe It’s Okay to Not Be Better?

or

Words of Wisdom From a Professional Drinker

Yes. I am addicted to shit. Not literal shit, but a bunch of stuff people become addicted to, alcohol mostly. Though, not in an alcoholic way quite yet, more in a binge-drinking sort of way.

I’ve been drinking since a young age. First to numb the pain of growing up in a culture that thought I was too weird, too stupid, too woman to do anything with myself. Second to numb the pain of trauma. Third to numb the pain of being around other people while maintaining a sense of self (aka being able to talk to other people). Fourth to feed my depression because it gets really hungry and loves booze. 5th because beer tastes good.

Blah blah. I could keep going with a ton of reasons, but who cares.

I have drank  (drunk?) A LOT.

And I don’t even feel bad about it.

I only want to admit that I do it. Perhaps because I haven’t hit rock bottom. Or maybe that time I drank and got raped was rock-bottom and I just can’t get myself to admit that the drinking was the problem not the rapist… wait. That sentence is wrong. It was for sure the rapist’s fault that he raped.

But anyhoo, back to me, enough about that loser.

I love to drink. Drinking loves me. But perhaps we’re not in the healthiest of relationships? Perhaps we’re a little too dependent upon one another?

I’ve been in Florida for just a few days and my desire to drink has shockingly subsided. Sure, I had 4 beers over like 7 hours earlier today while at the beach, but I could have lived with or without and been fine. I didn’t continue to drink after I woke up from a nap, which I would normally do. So, progress not perfection right?

That’s the other thing though. I’m really getting tired of personal growth bullshit. Can we all just admit that we’re not good at certain things? That we are in fact BAD at certain things? Why do we have to feel this constant need to IMPROVE? I’m not advocating stagnation. I believe we should move more like water in a river than water in a puddle. Yet, if you’ve ever watched a river it does have times where it just chills. It’s okay to fucking chill.

“Transformation”…”Personal Growth”… “Mindfulness”… In the U.S. these concepts are part of an industry… this industry is rooted in capitalism. Trying to improve your spirit is just as much about making money as trying to make yourself prettier. You are already pretty. You already have spirit.

Feeling guilt or shame because you’re not namaste enough will not make you more namaste it will just make you feel guilt and shame.

Do we need any more of that?

I think not.

How does addiction and personal growth interconnect?

Well. How many people feel guilt and shame about whatever the fuck is wrong with them?

Everyone.

Why not just embrace that there is shit wrong with you? Be a fucking chill ass river for a day or month or year or whatever. Maybe stop worrying about BEING BETTER and just be whatever the fuck you are?

It’s at least more liberating for me so far. And my addictions have stopped being so addicting, so perhaps there’s something to “not growing” after all?

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