Weird Sex Wednesday: Fight Fucking

fight fucking

You’re Fighting and Then You’re Fucking… How?

or

Hot Couples Everywhere Are Getting into Ficking (aka Fight Fucking)


Last night the guy that I’ve been seeing and I got into it. To keep it short, we have differing opinions on the state our openness with other relationships should be. Maybe he’s trying to cowboy rope me into being monogamous. Maybe I’m trying to have the whole world. Perhaps it’s a little bit of both from both of us and we’re both right and wrong at the same time.

Regardless. I’m not going to go into that too much because it’s still quite fresh and that doesn’t seem fair to him.

What I do want to talk about since it is Weird Sex Wednesday is Fight Fucking. This past night has brought up a bunch of unanswered questions.

Why do we often end up fucking the person we’re fighting with?

Is it one of those things where the two people are both trying to prove something to each other?

Are they trying to hold onto each other even if the end is near?

Are they trying to hold onto each other so the end will not be near? Like, “remember this move? Yeah, you’re going to miss this pussy/dick/ass/etc. so we better make it right.”

What is the likelihood that the couple will continue on that trajectory? Like, almost rewarding each other for fighting.

Is it healthy?

Is it just something that happens?

To be honest, I haven’t been in a relationship for quite a while.

The last guy I liked well enough to want to be in a relationship ended up being clinically depressed and rejecting my invitation to become my boyfriend. That was during cuffing season, so sure, it was only a few months ago, but it was not a relationship.

Prior to that was my temporary / accelerated Burner boyfriend. We both knew he was going to leave after a month in the states, so it was easy to not get attached.

Before those two, it’s been like 4 years and that guy ended up fleeing the country because I fucked it up so badly (and an assortment of other reasons).

So yeah, here I am. So used to being independent. Strong. Free. Used to the one-night stands. The friend-with-benefit that leaves after two weeks to get back together with his ex-girlfriend. The guys who are emotionally unavailable so I become that too.

I don’t know how to be a girlfriend. Not really. Not like regular people do.

I’m scared. I push back. I fight with the guy I actually like. I don’t want him to go, but I don’t trust myself. So I hold on. We hold on a bit longer. And maybe after the fighting and the fucking and the fighting there will be something more to hold onto.

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Exploring Polyamory, Monogamy, and Open Relationships Part 1

monogamy is dead

More Than One Relationship?

or

Can’t Even Get One Relationship.

As many of you know from following my writing in the past, I’ve extensively discussed theories of monogamy, polyamory, and open relationships in general.

Many of you ask what I prefer.

Here I talk about it if you don’t want to read (I lost my new video so these are from a different night when I was slightly intoxicated):

Here I write about it if you do want to read:

To be completely real with you all, I’m not typically in something long enough to ever find out.

Sure, this says something about me. It says that I’m picky and the people that I like are seemingly pickier than I am. I can easily rub people the wrong way, right after I rub them the right way, if you get what I’m saying.

Relationship-wise I would be good with a boyfriend and a girlfriend and the occasional one night stand.

Or a boyfriend OR a girlfriend and the occasional one night stand.

Currently, I am participating in none of the above. I go on dates. I don’t think I’ve had a one night stand in months though; they’ve at least lasted two to three nights, hahaha.

Sometimes my roommate and I get drunk together and make-out. She has a boyfriend and her boyfriend has a boyfriend, so in that realm, I suppose you could say I’m polyamorous. Though not really.

Though maybe.

It’s easier to say I’m open to the possibilities.

Open to the possibilities of everything in life–sex, politics, opinions, sandwiches. I’m open to learning, growing, figuring my shit out, not trying to define myself one way or the other. Yet, I’m still fascinated by it all.

It is my current opinion that monogamy is not for everyone and should not even be the default relationship structure of our society. It’s rooted in scarcity, guilt, jealousy and capitalism, which are just not the greatest features to carry out intimacies with another person.

Yet, time is a real thing and relationships are hard work. When you add multiple relationships to the mix it gets harder and harder. So much communication. So much scheduling. So much talk talk talking about feelings and shit.

Mostly I like the idea that people can decide for themselves what’s best for them. I’m still trying to uncover that for myself. I know, I know, I’ve been trying to uncover it for at least 10 years, but at least I’m actively attempting to understand.

My sex drive is higher than average and I read too many books and intimidate pretty much every guy I meet soooooo here I am, keepin on. Considering taking a break from men and sticking with women for awhile, even though I do like my carrots there are plenty of other tasty things to eat in the world.

Perhaps I’m just tired. I haven’t even had any coffee yet today. . .

Here are some book suggestions on polyamory if you’re interested in exploring further:

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