Tits Out Truth Bombs Tuesday: Happy National Orgasm Day!

3 ways to enhance your orgasm

3 Ways to Enhance Your Big O

or

Cum So You Can Go (Again)

Happy National Orgasm Day! Orgasms (or orgasims like half the population spells when looking it up on google) are pretty much my favorite thing. At least when I think about my favorite things they almost all give me orgasms (sex, ice cream, those water bottle misters on a hot day) soooo saying orgasms are my favorite thing is pretty close to accurate and would make the most sense.

Anyway. Sometimes orgasms are way more difficult for females who are having sex with men (me included!). But never fear! It is possible to do. Below I have listed three easy ways to enhance your orgasms no matter who you’re banging (man, woman, yourself etc). Enjoy (and please, cum again).

Here are Three Easy Ways to Enhance Your Orgasm

1. Exercise to Sexercise

Move your body to really mmmoovvee your body. Whether you’re doing high or low impact, weight-training, HIIT, yoga, etc. when you get your blood flow going it helps make it easier to get off. Plus, there are some stats out there that says exercise raises testosterone in women, which can help boost that sex drive.  (I have not read the full report but you can and then you can tell me about it.) Also, when your body is in better shape it increases endurance, strength, and flexibility which all can have a major impact on how well you perform in the bedroom. I’m not saying you have to become a major stud muffin muscle machine, but it could be fun to be able to hold your partner up against a wall or pull your legs up over your head.

2.  Add (More) Toys to Your Sex Game

I’m a huge proponent of incorporating sex toys into the bedroom (or wherever you’re doing it). There is something for everyone out there in the world of adult play toys. In fact, the ones I’m featuring below were toys recommended to me by other people/friends/people I trust have good sex. I have yet to try them myself, but they are on my “To Do” list. Let me know if you’ve experienced any of these or if you have a favorite in these of these categories that you think are must-haves.

Hit the Clit Vibe with: Je Joue Mimi Soft Luxury Rechargeable Clitoral Vibrator

(Click here to explore more)

best clit vibe for orgasms
My previous boss at Fascinations llloovveeed this clit vibrator.

Find the G-Spot withFun Factory Stronic G Rechargeable Blue Thrusting G-Spot Vibrator

(Click here or on the picture to explore more)

best orgasms for g spot
You can look at the surface area on the g-spot head of this vibrator and tell it’s a good one. Plus Fun Factory makes some of the best toys on the market.

What What in the Butt with: We-Vibe Ditto Rechargeable Remote and App Control Blue Butt Plug (plus you get to play with technology with this one!)

(Click here or the picture to explore more)

toys for better orgasms
Can you imagine someone turning on your vibrating butt plug from thousands of miles away?

3. Those Who Breathe Together Cum Together

Yes, it sounds like hippie shit, and maybe it is hippie shit, but breath work can help with focus and it can help people learn how to let go of the bullshit that might clog the brain and prevent the orgasm from entering the body.  Many tantric people claim to have the best orgasms EVER and though it looks silly wouldn’t you prefer experiencing as much pleasure as possible?

You can just slow down your breathing or catch on the same rhythm as your partner and either of those things can drastically change the orgasm experience. Breathwork can make anal sex way more pleasurable by allowing you and/or your partner to go with the intensity instead of against it.

More on each of these topics to cum. . . I mean, come, later.

When you have a better bed, you have better sex (and better sleep, win win):

Get $100 OFF any size Layla mattress + a FREE LAYLA PILLOW!

Become a Go Eat A Carrot Patron on Patreon!

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Show support by purchasing something for me from my Amazon Wish List (I’ll review whatever gets sent my way!)

Need Toys? Here Are Links to My Top 3 Favorite Brands:

Tantus

We-Vibe

Lelo

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Is Human Male Cum Vegan?

healthy phallic eating

Are you a vegan worried about swallowing cum?

or

Swim on, semen swimmers, swim on

The backstory

aka

How the fuck did I even GET HERE today?!

This morning I walked back into my house (after leaving man’s house and walking home) wearing the same clothes I had worn last night, my “walk of hell yeah, I got laid” (instead of the walk of shame… as there is no shame in getting laid). Anyway. I skipped into the kitchen because man had made me coffee before I left and my hangover was masked by a liquid blanket of caffeine. I opened the fridge and realized I had no food. I should have realized that earlier since I know for a fact that I haven’t been to the grocery store in over two weeks and yet somehow I always manage to find something to eat, even if it’s leftover celery from the wings I had eaten with another dude the night prior. In any event, I realized that I should probably get my shit together and go and get groceries. If I could walk a mile and a half to go on a date I can walk the 6 blocks it takes to get to Safeway.

I have been contemplating going vegan for a week just to like cleanse my system and force myself to eat healthy stuff like carrots and asparagus and eggplant and other foods that resemble penises that are supposed to help make you big, hard, and strong. I opened an old vegan cookbook that was on the shelf hoping it would inspire healthy eating and ideas on what to get at the grocery store. As I was leafing through the vegan cookbook a beautiful drawing fell out onto my lap. The drawing* is of a person with boobs and a giant cock jizzing all over with the word “Spunk” written out in jizzy-like font.

penis facts and veganism
Is spunk vegan?

The drawing made me think back to the time when I actually was full-on vegan, for two whole years I refrained from the meat and the dairy and the eggs, and yes I still got laid. But! A debate would often come up in friend circles. Is human male ejaculate vegan?

The FINAL Answer.

Quite simply, yes.

Human male ejaculate contains sugars, proteins, and fatty acids that are designed to help the sperm along their journey to the egg (sperm itself only accounts for about 1% of jizz). Most men cum about a teaspoon of semen at a time. This teaspoon of guy-goo is about 5 to 25 calories and though it does contain protein you’d need to basically drink at least a 4 ounce glass of it to get any protein benefits.

But, the question was, is it vegan?!

Dudes. Chill. I know.

I already said YES. Cum is vegan.

If you’re vegan you can swallow a load any fucking time you want.

Assuming that you’re having consensual sex and the other person says it’s okay to eat their splooge.

Because consent is actually what makes ejaculate vegan. Consciousness allows one person to give permission to another person to eat something that has cum out of the body. I’m not sure you could get much more vegan than that actually.

P.S.
Please don’t be dumb and try to argue with me that sperm is people. Sperm is not people, okay. Sperm is sperm. Sperm is owned by the dude and when that dude gives it to someone else they are giving a gift, not of life, but of sperm. Sperm is sperm… remember that the next time you’re eating a carrot.

P.P.S.
Some vegans will only have sex with other vegans, typically this is for political reasons such as “I’m not fucking some non-woke meat eater.” Yet, my roommate just brought up the concept that some vegans think that meat will get into the sperm.

According to all of my research, there is only anecdotal evidence that diet impacts the taste/smell of sperm; it’s actually hydration that will determine the amount of cum that, well, comes out. As far as the meat going into the makeup of the sperm, that seems ridiculous and not accurate and I could find no scientific backing of that BUT prove me wrong?! I’m sure there’s a vegan out there ready to prove me wrong. I’m mean come on, you’re all a bunch of fucking food-trolls, I know because I used to be one of you.

*Do you want to own the above pictured found art piece? Name your price and contact me for details.

Become a Go Eat A Carrot Patron on Patreon!

Follow me on all the Social Media

Instagram
Twitter
Facebook

Show support by purchasing something for me from my Amazon Wish List (I’ll review whatever gets sent my way!)

Need Toys? Here Are Links to My Top 3 Favorite Brands:

Tantus

We-Vibe

Lelo