Can Guys and Girls Just Be Friends?
Decoding Girl-to-Girl Talk
Over the weekend I hung out with this guy who’s pretty cute. One I had met on Tinder many months ago and then finally decided to give a second chance. No, he was not the guy who recently ripped my heart out, but a guy who I had gone on a few dates with, who claimed to be into me and then ghosted me for two weeks only to tell me out the blue that he had decided to get back with his ex.
As you can imagine, it didn’t work out with him and his ex.
Let me know if it has EVER worked out when you’ve gotten back with your ex and I will retract my statement that it never does.
Anyhoo, I figured I’d give him a second chance since I gave the rip-out-my-heart guy one and he did much worse things like hitting on my friends while I was in the other room or right beside him in his truck etc. etc.
New/old guy and I were at a show at Cervantes (the first time I had ever been to Cervantes and I must say it’s a pretty nice venue). New/old guy happens to know just about everyone in this city, I suppose being a native helps and also he’s like way more extroverted than I will ever be.
We’re standing in the middle of the crowd near the stage when this woman walks up and says hello.
She pulls me aside and says, “I don’t know how long you’ve known X but I just wanted to tell you we’re just friends.”
I raise an eyebrow, laugh, “Okay.”
She scurries away.
I look at new/old guy like wtf?
We both shrug.
I tell him about it later because here’s the deal. No woman ever says that they’re “just friends,” with a guy unless they:
- Fucked them once and it didn’t work out how they wanted it to.
- They want to fuck them and they just haven’t done it yet.
It’s a weird thing to tell another woman. If you’re friends with someone you typically do not need to clarify that because by walking up to said person and saying “hello,” you’re acknowledging that you at least know each other and thus are probably friends or why else bother going up to the person (particularly in a crowded venue during the middle of a concert).
Perhaps it was her intention that I mention it to him? Perhaps she wanted me to put it in his brain that they COULD BE MORE?
If you want to be more than ‘just friends’ make a move that’s a little less passive-aggressive? If you want to plant the seed in a guy’s brain/penis I’d suggest talking directly to them. Maybe MAYBE try flirting in real life.
I don’t know, I could be wrong here, but grrrl I’m telling you if you want to move away from ‘just friends’ to something more (particularly now that you notice he’s with another woman) I’d say go for it before it’s too late. You never know when he’ll decide to get back with his ex again.