Death: The One Thing We’re All Avoiding

Let’s Talk About Death, Baby

Death and the Corona Virus

The fact of the matter is that we’re all in quarantine as a way to avoid death, our own death or the death of someone we love. 

And for good measure. 

This corona virus ain’t playing. 

According to a May 5 2020 post on Aljazeera:

“The death toll in the United States continues to surge with 70,847 deaths and 1,201,337 cases. The US continues to lead worldwide cases and deaths from the virus.”

Not only has Covid-19 killed a bunch of people, it has completely destroyed the economy and the livelihoods of people all over the world. Everyone is stuck at home, waiting. Waiting to not die. Not yet anyway. 

This pandemic has brought to the surface our biggest fears and uncertainties about the future.

But one thing is true regardless, we’re all going to die. 

Yikes. 

Or maybe better yet, Yay?

What I’ve noticed, observing from my basement dwelling quarantine, is that no one is straight up talking about death, what it means to die, how to accept our own end. 

We’re all busy baking bread or drinking margaritas or trying to get through to the unemployment office or working an essential job where any one person could come in and bring the entire place to its knees; where at any moment our coworkers or loved ones or lovers or friends could die. We could be dead too.  

Let’s be clear– this has always been true — yet it’s right here in our faces, our faces covered by masks. 

Pema Chodron aks:

“Can we abide in the openness that presents itself when the bottom falls out of our dream?”

Can we move forward when everything in our daily existence gets uprooted, changes, becomes something we never even imagined before? Can we accept the idea that it may cease to move forward at all? 

Facing Death

Why is there so much fear around death? 

Why are people afraid to talk about it?

What would happen if you took a moment and turned to face it instead of avoiding the very idea it? 

What would it look like? Feel like? Could you get past your sadness? Your grief? Your anger? Could you get to a place of acceptance? 

I saw this image the other day of a baby connected to her mother’s umbilical cord right next to an image of a human connected to the umbilical cord of the spirit world. 

How fascinating to imagine that we’re all just babies, earth, our mother, death a passage into the vast universe. 

But where will you go? Who will you be? Will you ever exist again? What will happen to your family? Your friends? Will it matter if you are no longer here to think about it? 

If you’re dead you no longer have to worry. At least that’s a bonus. 

Death and God

Of course, I don’t want to die, not yet anyway. I have accepted that it will happen at some point. And I am okay with it for the most part on most days. Everyone has their own belief system, they’re own connection or disconnection with God, the Universe, the Source, whatever you like to call it. 

I’m a big Alan Watts fan, I read The Taboo Against Knowing Yourself right before this whole pandemic started. I like the idea that we’re all manifestations of God. We’re all fragments, pieces of God experiencing God. A big interconnected Kaleidoscope of life ever unfolding; our eyes are the eyes of God watching the world from a very specific perspective.

Or as Watts says: 

“God is the Self of the world, but you can’t see God for the same reason that, without a mirror, you can’t see your own eyes, and you certainly can’t bite your own teeth or look inside your head. Your self is that cleverly hidden because it is God hiding.” 

So, I suppose I am less worried about my own personal death, knowing that we’re all interconnected elements of God and we shall continue onward regardless of our own specific conscious experiences.

I don’t know, sometimes I hurt my own brain thinking about all of this stuff. I guess I’m just curious if anyone else has been contemplating death, because it seems like most people are doing everything but. But, perhaps it’s one of those Taboos we’re not supposed to talk about. What do you think?  

Before you die you might as well buy yourself a nice toy and have an orgasm or too (I believe an orgasm is also considered a tiny death… or is that a sneeze? Who can keep up? )

Anyway. There’s unbelievable products for men, women, couples etc. And now, FREE SHIPPING at Lelo (and if you buy something with this link I get a little % kicked back to me, so thank you for getting off!)

 

Just Because I’m Sex Positive Does Not Mean I Want to Have Sex With You

What is sex positivity?

Sex Positive and the Dudes Who Need it Most

The other day I was asked a rather rude question.

It is not uncommon I suppose, when you talk about sex and sexuality, it gets people riled up. 

Suddenly they think they can be crass because that is their view of sex. They think they can be dirty because they think sex is dirty. They can be off-putting and rude and awkward because they have never been given the tools to fully grasp who they are wholly (and that includes their own sexuality). 

And, so, I suppose I can’t take that much offense when someone who isn’t emotionally developed asks me a rude question. I can only hope for the best. The best being that they recognize they are being a dick and work on ways to be less of a dick in the future.

Anyhoo. Sexuality is a pretty big element in most people’s lives– even people who abstain– as many have to actively NOT do it etc. Sex is how we all got here (in case you missed that day in Health class). Good ole sperm and egg. 

Sex and Sexual Health

Sexual health makes up one of the many areas of general overall health–other areas include physical health, social health, financial health, emotional health, etc. 

Yet, sexuality comes with a whole host of issues that many of the others do not, for example, many people experience a lot of shame, confusion, mis-information, avoidance, religious propaganda etc. when it comes to sexuality. 

Sex positivity works to help overcome all of that. It’s about positive sexual health, empowered sexuality, sex without shame, sex with respect, consent, boundaries, desires, pleasures, etc. 

One of the issues I run into is that many men think that because I talk about sex I must WANT it ALL of the time and FROM ANYONE. 

In fact, that was what the rude question was all about. A person, who I politely declined a proposition from many many months ago, had the nerve to ask me if I were a [nympho] 

(in brackets because of course he didn’t spell it correctly). 

To be clear, a person can be sex positive and not want to engage in sexual activity with everyone they meet. 

A person can also be sex positive and WANT to engage in sexuality activity with everyone they meet. 

What Does it Mean to Be Sex Positive?

Being sex positive means that you accept and respect your own sexuality and everyone elses around you with openness, honesty, consent, communication, etc. 

To do this we may have to unlearn many of the ideas and concepts that we grew up with; we may have to explore new ideas, ask questions, be curious about what could be instead of making assumptions about where we are or who other people are etc. We also have to learn how to ask better questions, how to be respectful and tactful when we talk about sexuality with those around us. 

Anyhoo. Personally, I have explored many many options and am currently in the process of learning more about myself while being open to a meaningful long-term relationship with someone who actually wants more from me than just SEX. I know, hard to believe, but it’s true. 

Yes, I can still be sexy, yes I can still have desires and fantasies, and get attention from people who think I’m hot, but no, I personally do not plan to bang every Todd, Dick, and Hairy that ask. 

Thank you for asking, but no thank you. 

If you’d like to take me on a date and get to know me (once this quarantine is all over) then you may ask me that and I will let you know one way or the other. 

If you are not interested that is OKAY too, I do not need to know that you are not interested, it makes no difference to me. We all have different tastes, desires, attractions etc. you go after whatever those are to you (consensually of course). 

If you continue to have questions you’re always welcome to hire me as a consultant where I will answer and advise based on my background in sex positivity. 

Good day to you and to all!

P.S.

Why not buy yourself a new toy and continue your sex positive exploration while helping your fellow sex positive blogger get a small % in return for making said recommendation? Cool. Discover Lelo for ultimate pleasure experiences.

Do We Really Want To Go Back to Normal?

Perhaps it’s time to envision a new way of being.

It’s pretty clear that the corona virus is changing the way that we exist on this planet. None of us having any idea how it is all going to unfold. Will medical professionals find a way to contain Covid-19? Even so, what happens when another virus pops up in its place? Is the economy going to tank? Will millions of lives be sacrificed to save it?

These are all things we’re about to find out.

While all of this is going down and we’re all quarantined in our selected locations, many of us jobless, many of us feeling very much non-essential right now, I encourage everyone to take an hour or however long and dive into your dreams. I’m not talking about the stories that play out in your subconscious when you’re asleep. I’m talking about what you dream about for your life.

If you could somehow reinvent how the world works, what would it look like?

Using your wildest imagination as we can only imagine as much as we know, what could humanity actually be?

Is it possible to live in a society that values people over profits?

What would a world without money look like?

Could a world exist where we valued giving, sharing, trading, more so than the dollar?

Is it possible to have gifts, to be creative, to encompass amazing personality characteristics without them being comodified? Without having to turn everything into a product or a brand?

What could a world without money do?

Our planet, our people need healed.

How does that work?

When someone gets sick should they get access to health care like any other person who gets sick?

When anyone rich or poor can catch viruses that kill, that can kill hundreds, thousands, millions of other people, shouldn’t we have systems in place to handle said situations?

Are you really THAT comfortable that you want to go back to how things were?

Was your life really THAT great? What deep down did you want out of life?

You say you just want a decent job and loving family… well WHY do you want a job? Is it for money? So you can provide for your loving family? Is it so you can buy all the things that you need to survive?

What if you already had all of those things?

Would you want a job so you felt like you had a ‘purpose’?

Why do you feel like you need a purpose to live?

And could you work, could you do the things that you loved doing, things that gave you ‘purpose’ if that’s what you truly needed without it being connected to income? Could you work on a farm or on a painting or mowing your neighbor’s lawn just because you enjoy the work and because it helps connect you to other people?

How attached are we to money that we need to go back to normal?

What if instead we created a new normal? A better normal? A normal where everyone thrived?

What would that look like to you?

Are you willing to get out of your comfort zone to get there?

If you’re not willing are you at least ready?

If life will never go back to normal then we need to start imagining a new world that aligns with what we want not what people with all the money think we need.

In the meantime, if you’re all alone might as well go F yourself. Here’s a coupon. XOXO

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The World is Canceled, What Now?

Corona Virus Got You Down?

All your plans are canceled? Not sure what to do with yourself? Tired of bingeing on Netflix? Not sure what social distancing really entails. Well, never you fear, I’ve spent a many years developing superb ‘hiding from people’ skills and I can tell you, you’re about to have a really good time. 

Here are 5 Things to Do While Social Distancing

  1. Finally read a GD book 

Isn’t it great that you now have all the time in the world to just sit back and catch up on your reading list? Perhaps you’re confused and do not know where to start. Well, if you already have a pile I suggest starting at the top of that. If you do not, here are some book suggestions based on our current corona virus / social distancing/ world canceled/ stuck at home / hermit life / situation we’re all in.

My Year of Rest and Relaxation by Ottessa Moshfegh

The Stranger in the Woods: The Extraordinary Life of the Last True Hermit by Michael Finkle

The Plague by Albert Camus

All My Friends Are Dead by Avery Monsen

The Book: On the Taboo Against Knowing Who You Are by Alan Watts

Welcoming the Unwelcome by Pema Chodron 

2. Move That Ass

Sure you can’t go to the gym anymore but you can certainly step outside and go for a fucking walk. Just don’t touch anything or anyone when you do it. Get that vitamin D, it might the only D you get for a while. 

In addition to walking, you can find pretty decent gym replacement streaming videos on YouTube.

Two of my favorite streaming workout channels are: 

Sydney Cummings

Fitness Blender

3. Get Your Head Right

What a perfect time to go inside yourself and finally deal with some of your issues. No need to worry about making it to the party later or having to deal with anyone seeing your sad puffy eyes. Cry it out. Sit around and ‘be.’ Maybe meditate for a moment in time. Go down a YouTube hole and learn all about emotional maturity or overcoming bad habits or how to be alone etc. 

The School of Life videos are a good place to start:  

4. Love Yo’Self

There’s research out there that says masturbation actually improves your immunity. So, have at it, give yourself a hand or two, or if you’re tired of doing ALL the work, might I suggest Lelo’s F1 Developers Kit for penises and the Lelo Sona Cruise for clitorises. 


Lelo’s F1 Developer’s Kit

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5. Talk to Someone You Know Or Don’t Know

Have you been putting off making that phone call? How’s your mom doing? Want to tell an old girlfriend you’re still in love with her? Want to ask someone out after the world comes back on again? Bored? Lonely? Well, luckily the phone and the internet still work. So, call someone you know. Or maybe someone you don’t know?

Need further advice? Find me on Patreon for a 1-1 online chat.

Is Either Political Party Worth Fighting For?

Political polarization and our inability to move forward

I’ve been reading The Book: On the Taboo Against Knowing Who You Are by Alan Watts. My brain is exploding with each sentence. He’s dropping ideas that I’ve definitely thought about but never quite in the way he’s talking about them. Like, for example, in explaining God– God is trying to look at your own eye balls with your eyeballs without a mirror (not a direct quote, but I’ve been working through that one for a few days now.)  

Anyhoo. While reading the chapter called: ‘The Game of Black-and-White,’ Watts writes: 

“But the mistake in the beginning was to think of solids and space as two different things, instead of as two aspects of the same thing. The point is that they are different but inseparable, like the front end and rear end of a cat. Cut them apart, and the cat dies.” 

My immediate reaction to this was not about his actual argument, which is that we are all connected to the universe the way our lungs are connected to our body or limbs are connected to a tree etc. No, my first response was, ‘is this how we can finally end our polarized political system?’ 

If we replace ‘solids and space’ with ‘liberals and conservatives’ or ‘Democrats and Republicans,” then it goes to show, that like ‘lightness & darkness, ‘matter and space,’ ‘good and evil’ you can not understand one without the existence of the other. 

But in the case of the U.S. political system– do we need to? 

Is either side REALLY worth fighting for or could we potentially cut the tail from the head and let the cat die? 

It’s like it’s own microscopic circus and we’re all audience members cheering them on, but it’s just cheap entertainment. No substance. No actual policy changes. No real help to the people who need it. So, why have it at all? 

Why not let it die and try something different instead? 

Or we can continue to let the snake eat its own tail in this forever going cycle of nothing. Whichever.

Giving Up Sex For God

On Voluntary Celibacy

It will be 69 days this Thursday the 14th of November.

69 days of no sixty-nine.

69 days of no sex of any kind (except the occasional rub out and if you really want to count the time my period got triggered and blood gushed out everywhere upon penetration and we immediately stopped, but I do not want to count that or even remember it so let’s just not).

We hear the term ‘incels,’ thrown around a lot these days. An incel is someone who is involuntarily celibate as in they want to have sex but they have such shitty personalities that no one wants to have sex with them. The fact of the matter is that these people should be called involuntarily-abstinent because people who are celibate are typically choosing to abstain from sex for a higher spiritual purpose, whereas when one is abstinent they’re usually strictly avoiding sex for any or whatever reason (or for involuntary reasons aka being insecure and annoying).

So, for the last two-ish months I have been for (the most part) voluntarily celibate.

In a way you could say that I’m doing it for God… or better yet, not doing it for God. If you look at God as the interconnection of all things and I as one of the parts of those things, amen, namaste, hallelujah.

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Why, I’m sure you’re wondering, did this woman who has run a sex blog for the past year+, who clearly has a super high sex drive, and pretty much gets dick (and pussy) thrown her way every day, GIVE IT ALL UP FOR GOD (god being the interconnection of all things and her self being one of those things, god=her, etc…) ????

Giving It Up Accidentally On Purpose

Well, it wasn’t just one thing and it wasn’t all entirely on purpose.

Perhaps you could say I was over-saturated with sex. And honestly, no matter how much you like something, you can certainly over-do anything.

Also, I was losing myself, in the real world and online.

As you may recall from many blogs ago, I accidentally fell in love with a sociopath. I then spent the last 10+ months going to therapy (twice a week) to overcome my terrible habit of dating terrible people. Of course, I couldn’t leave a learning opportunity unfulfilled when a sexy con-artist walked into my life RIGHT after I finally had my ‘ah-ha-moment’ of dude v. man clarity. That “relationship” lasted a month–turns out therapy is actually working and the Red Flag Dudes go out the door at a much speedier pace now.

To top it off, the final straw of it all–I fucked a republican and he ended up fucking me in ways that I am currently still not ready to go into (ways that really have nothing to do with the fact that he is a republican — only that I should have known it was going to be a piss-poor situation… pun may have been intended there).

Online wasn’t much better. I started this blog as an opportunity to express my truth. I wanted to dive into topics on politics, health, sexuality, body positivity etc. but as with any sort of capitalistic endeavor you see what gets the most hits, the most likes, and you roll with that. At some point, instead of talking about whatever was on my mind at the time I ended up shaping it to get the most traffic. But getting ‘the most traffic’ was never one of my main goals. The main goal was connection to others through self-expression.

I cannot go without speaking for a moment about the energy-exchange that occurs through social media. Our interactions online impact us in real life even if many people want to pretend that there’s some sort of barrier between the two (there is not). Though I am often writing about sex-positive topics it often felt that many men believed that I specifically wanted to have sex with them and not only did I want to, that they were entitled to have that experience with me because they took a second to DM me some ridiculous message.

Here are examples of the last few I received:

  • “Heyyy”
  • “Can I have nudes”
  • “Hi”
  • “I got a question”
  • “Are white guys allowed to fuck you too..??”
  • “My dick is19,cm good??”
  • “Hy”
  • “Hi”. . . .( 4 days later) –> “?????”
  • “I love porn and you?”

I understand my line of work breeds this kind of stuff but it’s still exhausting, it causes burn out just reading them, and it makes me want to throw my phone in the creek.

Find out what I’ve been up to instead of the sex in my latest video:

After the sociopath and the con-artist, and the republican, and the strangers from the internet I was feeling really quite over it all. My high sex drive did a 180 and buried itself under ground. I thought something was really wrong with me.

I went to Planned Parenthood.

Something was wrong with me.

Actually, several things were wrong with me.

I’m not going to go into details, suffice to say they were all treatable things, treatable with antibiotics and no sex.

Then my pap came back.

Abnormal.

After that, I had a pretty standard mental freak out followed by a physical biopsy.

Another 7+ days no sex.

Not that I even wanted it.

I had started to call my vagina, ‘The Cave of Nightmares,’ because everything that followed fucking that republican was like a series of bad dreams confined to a warm dark hole deep inside of me.

All of that time away from casual sex made me realize how much I didn’t really care for it anymore. It served its purpose at the time, it was fun, it was distracting, it was always a story of sorts, but I was/am over it.

I didn’t want a Cave of Nightmares. I wanted a Secret Space of Splendor or a Hole of Holy Heaven or just like a regular functioning NORMAL vaginal area.

I got it. The biopsy came back normal. Thank the Goddess. But all of the above nonsense has helped me realign my relationship goals and my relationship with my body.

So, I have made a vow to myself.

The next person who gets the opportunity to explore my Pocket of Paradise will be someone who matters. It will be with someone that I share a deeper connection with; it will have meaning and romance and passion and green flags and magic and mystery and safety. We will create a foundation of friendship first, it will be rooted in love and the desire to propel each other into better versions of ourselves while accepting each other for the core of who we are.

Everything else is a bore.

I’d rather have no sex than boring sex (though I’d still eat bad pizza as opposed to no pizza at all).

If You’re Angry and You Know it Clap Your Hands

how to use anger

Anger as an Energy

On Embracing the Darker Emotions

For the past few days I’ve been a fiery ball of pure anger. Why am I angry? There’s no specific reason. It’s everything and it’s nothing.

I did everything in my power to curb the anger. I worked out. I went to therapy. I went for a run right after therapy. I ate some healthy food. I ate some unhealthy food. I stewed in my room alone away from everyone. I drank beer, a many beers. And after all of that I was still pissed.

I had this unshakeable desire to punch people. I had this unshakeable desire to be punched. I tried to get people to start a fight club with me. They refused. It made me want to punch them.

I kept it contained though, I punched no one not even myself.

Check out:

The Cow in the Parking Lot: A Zen Approach to Overcoming Anger

When I said there’s no specific reason as to why I’m angry that’s not entirely true. I’m pissed off at myself. I pissed at myself for being so lousy at telling other people to fuck off.

That’s right.

I am mad that I’m bad at being a bitch.

I’m mad that I try so hard to understand other people’s emotions and motivations and desires and logic that I overlook my own.

I’m mad that I am not more discerning and I let people into my life who should never have access to it to begin with. I’m mad that I allow myself to be manipulated and lied to for other people’s sick amusement.

Check out:

Confessions of a Sociopath: A Life Spent Hiding in Plain Sight

I’m mad that I have to continually tell men ‘no’ when I tell them I don’t want to see them anymore, that they think they’re entitled to me at any time because I went out with them for a month or six… or they’re entitled to me just because I’m a woman and they think I exist solely for them.

It is not my responsibility to make a person feel okay after they have treated me like shit.

If you treat someone badly and then afterward they do not like you, you have to own your actions and accept that someone does not like you because of them. And you can’t make up for it with a sappy text out of the blue or an invitation to dinner.

If you fuck up and want to repair it, you can’t just say you want to repair it and it magically is repaired. You must do actual work. You must put in actions over and over that prove the words you say or else it’s just bullshit.

The thing is, I’ve been too easy on men. It’s time for me to re-establish my boundaries. To be even louder and bolder with my ‘no.’ To tell people to fuck off the first time they do something bullshitty because baby doesn’t have time for any more bullshit.

There are only so many hours in the day and I want to spend those hours with people who are invested in creating meaningful fulfilling relationships and aren’t just trying to distract themselves from their own pain.

Check out:

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I own my pain. I own my anger. I take care of it by creating instead of destroying. Sure, I want to punch people but I’ll do it with my words and not my fists.

So if I tell you to fuck off, it’s not a reflection of who I am, it’s me seeing you for who you think I am and me disagreeing with that opinion.

Enneagrams, Russian Doll, and Killing Yourself

killing the self

A Mental Health Update

Yesterday I went to a therapist for the first time in my entire life.

I’ve been overcoming depression on and off for about twenty years give or take. It’s not that I’ve ever necessarily been afraid to go to therapy. I tell strangers my problems all the time over the internet. I’ve always thought that I could work through everything myself, I thought I was strong enough, that comparatively my problems were nothing.

Well, a few things happened all at once to finally get me to make the call. First, I ended yet another toxic relationship. Then, I went to Planned Parenthood after the end of this toxic relationship and discovered my pH balance in my vagina was off. Shock shock. Not a big deal. This happens to women all the time, we just tend to keep it to ourselves. They put me on antibiotics and thus for the last week I have not been drinking. I’ve instead been filling my time with a lot of reading and a lot of Netflixing.

Broad City Collection

One of the many books I’ve been plowing through is a book about Understanding the Enneagrams. At first, I thought this whole thing was going to be bullshit but bullshit can be entertaining. Initially, I was drawn to it from a writer’s perspective to better understand the motivations behind different people’s actions and reactions. Enneagrams divide people into 9 different personality types that continue to get more complicated and nuanced as you learn more.

As I was reading it I found that people I know fit within certain numbers perfectly. Like the guy I fell for most recently was an unhealthy 3; no self-worth thus manipulates and deceits people until he brings them down to his level. I found myself too. I’m an 8. The Challenger. The Challenger rises from a loss of innocence that can then manifest itself in lustful ways.

Fast forward.

I’m binge-watching Russian Doll on Netflix. I love Natasha Lyonne and Chloe Sevigny. I stick with it even though it starts off as this Groundhog’s Day-esque format of which makes me go mad. Yet, I put my anxiety on hold.

There was something quite powerful with this show even though the repetition of repeating the same day can make a person crazy, which is exactly the point, right? You keep getting thrown these same situations over and over because you’ve never solved the problem you were meant to solve.

The only difference is that our patterns come back with different masks, we don’t get a do-over. (I will not go down the rabbit hole of alternative dimensions today because that just gets complicated.)

Anyway, so we can see the main character repeating the same patterns within the same time frame of a day, day after day, but it’s just the same as us waking up day after different day and getting to try again.

At the end, she is finally confronted with her loss of innocence. She has no where else to go and must take the steps to overcome the pain of her past. She has to kill the part of herself that she no longer the needs. The part of herself that has been trying to protect her all of these years but has instead started to do the opposite. This is not a physical death. It is a letting go.  

Is this character an enneagram 8? Most def.  

Is this all just coincidentally unfolding right here right now for me? Nah. It’s time.

It’s time for me to take proactive steps to stop my pattern that are holding me back.  Sure, I’m strong, but I’m stronger now because I can admit that I can’t do everything on my own.

Imbolc: Drink a Milkshake & Celebrate Halfway to Spring!

imbolc wiccan

Witchy Ways: WTF is Imbolc?

A Quick Look at the Wiccan Celebration of Imbolc

Imbolc is here! One thing I do love about living in this world is the number of holidays that exist, particularly when you embrace them all instead of being uptight about just one being the “truth.”

You can get away with it too, at least with perfect strangers. They’re not going to know you’re not Jewish. Or you’re not Buddhist. Or you’re not a Satanist. So, why not throw a little party every time someone somewhere is celebrating something? Why leave yourself out? As Drake and Fiona Apple and the Buddha all say, “YOLO.”

I apologize for the yolo-ing. I know that’s so 2011. And if you’ve been yolo-ing since 2011 you’re probably dead by now. But we’ll skip that joke for now.

Anyway, today is a very special day, today marks the Gaelic traditional Wiccan festival of celebration Imbolc that runs from tonight through tomorrow (February 1-2). It’s a holiday that celebrates the midway point between the Winter Solstice and the Spring Equinox.

According to The Celtic Connection:

“Imbolc means in the belly of the mother because that is where seeds are beginning to stir as it is Spring.”

Culturally, in Ireland (and the surrounding areas), this was (and is) a time of the lambing season where herd animals give birth or are on the way to giving birth to new offspring.  

Imbolc is a time to celebrate new beginnings. It’s like a mini spring cleaning before a spring cleaning– this can be with your physical objects or with the letting go of bullshit that no longer serves you.

What I find so interesting about these pagan/Wiccan holidays is the fact that our culture has basically stolen all of them and then rebranded them.

We all know this is true with regards to Christmas and Halloween etc. but I’m saying any holiday you can think of can be traced back to other origins that are not originally Christian in nature. I’m not saying it’s wrong for Christians to take their own spin on celebrating the seasons etc. but I will say that they aren’t nearly as good at it and their branding is mediocre in comparison to some of these other ones.

For example. Imbolc is also referred to as Brigit’s Day, Brigit [Brighid] being the Celtic Fire Goddess “patron of smithcraft, healing, midwifery, and poetry.

During Imbolc:

“Brighid’s snake emerges from the womb of the Earth Mother to test the weather.”

This is the origin of Groundhog’s Day.

No offense to the groundhogs but a snake emerging from the womb to test the weather is WAY more badass. Like, can you picture Snake Womb’s Day–the movie? I can only imagine what kind of action-packed sex-fueled weird creepy shit would happen in that. (Starry a red-headed Irish witch, please and thank you.)

Another amazing thing about Imbolc is that one of the main ways you celebrate is by eating food, specifically all the dairy products. The dairy is supposed to symbolize fertility and abundance. So someone bring me an ice cream cake already. Or at least a grilled cheese.

Anyhoo. I’m actually pretty new to all of this stuff, but I feel like I should celebrate anyway since I discovered it. And this is America where you can celebrate everyone else’s holidays as an excuse to celebrate celebrating.

And to be honest I lean way closer in ideology to that which is more connected to nature and our connection to nature, so the discovery of Imbolc pleases me.

I have already started by rearranging my bedroom and going through stuff I no longer need or want. And this morning I went and got a pumpernickel everything bagel* with cream cheese (seeds, bread, dairy, for the win). Later I will light some candles and maybe take a milk and honey bath.

I know it probably doesn’t feel anywhere close to being spring if you’re currently dealing with the polar vortex over yonder across this beautiful country of ours. But, my friends, we’re halfway there–just hold on to your ridiculous amount of layers for a little bit longer. Soon we’ll be where the flowers are abloom and the milk runneth over and the birds are singing sweet sweet tunes from the green green trees.

Now let’s lick some cream to celebrate that!

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*I have a random story regarding a person that works at the bagel shop + golden showers that I have posted on Patreon for Freaky Fan Friday. 

It’s only a dollar to join at this level and I try to do a Freaky Fan Friday video every week (I miss one occasionally). Anyway, it’s a nice way to show your support of this blog so I can keep writing this blog not have to go work at the bagel shop with pee boy.

You can also show your support by buying me something to review off of my Amazon Gift List. It is my birthday month after all (Feb 16). I’ve added some new lingerie as I’m doing Valentine’s Day colors for Patreon exclusives each week.

I also don’t mind words of encouragement if that’s something you’re into and would rather spend your money on yourself, I understand that.

This would be a nice gift to buy one’s self for a little self-love during this love and fertility season. It vibrates! I’m sure we’re all wondering the same thing here. . . I mean I have one that doesn’t vibrate and it’s already pretty orgasmic when I roll my back out.

I’ve added the link to it on Amazon here; shopping–it’s how we do holidays best. Happy Imbolc. Happy Love month.