It’s Anal August, Get It
or
Drink Up That Anal Juice
It’s already August. Can you believe we’ve made it through half of summer already?
August is as good of a time as any for ANAL sex.
Show of fingers, how many have experienced anal before?
All of them? Wow, you dirty dirty slut-fingers.
How many of you thirsty mother fuckers actually crave anal sex? Well, today, I’m making a drink for you called Anal Juice. Inspired by anal sex gone wrong.
Here’s the deal. When you have anal sex you MUST use some sort of lube. It’s the number one rule for sticking it in the butt. Yes, relaxing into it, being receptive, easing in, those are all fine things to remember to do when someone is about to go in deep in your anus but really truly make sure you lube it down.
If you do not lube it down you could end up tearing part of your anal hole which could turn to anal leakage which could turn to incontinence which could turn to anal juice.
That’s like your butthole leaking uncontrollably.
So in honor of lube-less anal sex, I’ve concockted this very special summer cocktail recipe.
Anal Juice Cocktail Recipe
Ingredients
1-2 shots Whiskey
½ Lemon Juice
Blood Orange Ginger Beer
Directions
Dump the first two ingredients in a glass, top with ice. Unload the blood orange ginger beer on top. Drink up. Enjoy!
And be sure that when you do the what what in the butt butt you use the lube lube. Get some here, you freaks.
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I’m raising my hand high! I love anal! I like giving, but oh my do I love it when a woman dons her favorite strap-on and comes at me saying, “You’re going to be my bitch tonight. Bend over and assume the position.”
Give it to me! Deep, wide, lots of lube and make it something I’ll remember!